The blessings in the middle of the crazy.

I realize that I haven't updated this blog since the end of November. Most people have had updates from the phone or FB. Obviously we are home with our sweet boy, Kellen. I've been wanting to do a post since we've been home and sum up what has happened in our lives over the last 3 months.

To put it bluntly we are still processing everything. We are OVERJOYED that Kellen is with us. We are beyond blessed that we get to be his parents, that he gets to be our son. We cannot imagine our life or family without him. I had so many people tell me "when he is home, you'll forget about all the paperwork, all the worry, all the stress and tears." Nope. It is all still very real for us. I still cry...I still worry, there is still paperwork. Sure we aren't doing the waiting game anymore, no more tickets to buy, no more nursery to get ready...There is still paperwork for post placement reports ,taxes, readoption, doctors appointments, the list goes on. But it's our new normal. That has been our mantra that we live by now...This is our new normal and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I'd like to share a bit of what happened with our case and explain a little of what our story is. Every family who has or is adopting has a story. If some of this seems vague, it's because a lot of it is so complicated that it just makes our brain hurt to try and explain in too much detail...

After our case was sent to USCIS Nairobi, we heard from them that they were indeed requesting more evidence on our sons case to prove that he meets the U.S. definition of an orphan. We were provided a report that explains how the U.S. defines an orphan and what they were looking for from us. USCIS also told us that it was up to us, not our adoption agency (more on them in a sec) to prove this. USCIS told us that they would NOT communicate with our agency about this and that the "Burden of Proof" was on us as the Adoptive Parents...and we had 87 days to prove this, or he wouldn't get a visa to come home. I want to make sure that people understand that before our case was sent to USCIS and we were asked for additional proof, we had already been legally declared Kellen's parents. All of his official documents had been issued, our last name had been given to him. He was ours. And this new development of needing more evidence was daunting at first, but it DID NOT derail us. We were not going to give up on our son being in our family. Alright, U.S. Government. Bring it. It's on!

What happened is this:

1-Adam and I loaded up the minivan with luggage and the girls and drove to Dallas. (Most of my family is in Texas)

2-Adam got on a plane with a one way ticket to Ethiopia. No return date set. Me and the girls stayed in Texas for 3 weeks to spend Christmas with my family. We were in fighting mode...We had a peace that surpasses all understanding. We prayed about this and it was so obvious to us and to so many others that this is WHAT HAD TO HAPPEN in order for Kellen to be allowed to be in our family.

3-Adam and our adoption agency in Ethiopia worked like mad men to conduct interviews and an investigation into our son's case. (Another investigation) Let me pause here for a moment and talk about our adoption agency:

What happened to us is not uncommon. Unfortunately it has happened to hundreds of families adopting from Ethiopia in the last few months with all different adoption agencies. We and 1 other family were the first with our agency to have this happen....So we were all walking new territory together. Our adoption agency was SO SUPPORTIVE of Adam going to Ethiopia and figuring this out. They helped us every step of the way. Even though the U.S. government wouldn't allow any official stuff to be turned in on our case from our agency at this point, it had to be turned in by us, our adoption agency paved the way for us getting done what needed to get done. We could not have done it without them. (this was not the case with other families using other adoption agencies...so I HAVE to brag about ours for a bit)

4-Over the course of a couple weeks, Adam interviewed 5 different people who all played an important part in our son's story.

5-We hired an immigration attorney who helped walked Adam and I through all of this.

6- With the help of our attorney and her expertise, we sent off our final report to USCIS...Adam gathered evidence and turned it in to our attorney..She helped write our report to USCIS. It was 112 pages long. Not kidding. 4 pages of orphan definition and details requesting more evidence from our government, turned into 112 pages of PROOF that he was an orphan...Yep, if they were going to make us prove it, we were going to over prove it. Your welcome U.S. Government.

7-We were approved 1 month later. And allowed to bring Kellen home. Adam stayed in Ethiopia the entire time.

Adam and I never once doubted anything with our son's story or orphan status. The stuff we had to "deal" with was annoying, yes. It was hard watching other families go through the same stuff we were...It was so hard feeling completely alone in this. Did we ever doubt God? No. Did we cry tears of anger and frustration and hurt? Yes. A lot. Did we still praise our loving God? Yes. We knew the battle was already won for our son....

What we went through was the biggest challenge we've experienced. In the middle of it all, we had people tell us "oh it must be so hard to have Adam gone for Christmas." "It must be so stressful not knowing if he'll get a visa." "Why is this happening? I don't understand."

Kellen has been home almost 2 months now. In that time, we are still seeing God's hand in the most random things in our adoption. Kellen being in our family is God breathed.

When you know you are right in the middle of God's plan, all the crazy seems less crazy and all you can do is laugh. (Ok I wasn't laughing when the stress turned into shingles for me...but meh...I survived.).Here are the blessings that happened in the middle of all the crazy.

1) Adam got to be with Kellen on his 1st birthday in Ethiopia. Kellen had his daddy with him to sing Happy Birthday. That's pretty awesome.

2)Adam got to be with Kellen for Christmas. 2 Christmases to be exact...Ours and Ethiopian Christmas on Jan 7th. Score!

3) Me and the girls got to have precious family time in Texas for 3 weeks. We were surrounded with so much love and support while Adam was gone from both of our families.

4)Adam was in Ethiopia for 5 weeks. In those 5 weeks, he got to experience even more of our sons history, culture, and past. He fell in love with Ethiopia even more. If we didn't go through what we did, that wouldn't have happened. Adam lived it for more than a month. He met 25 other adoptive families coming through the doors of the guest house who were coming for court. He got to see 25 families meet their precious kids for the first time. That never gets old. He got to celebrate with 25 families passing court.

5) There was another family in Ethiopia with Adam going through the EXACT same thing as us with their child's case. This couple we met in July. They are now LIFE LONG FRIENDS. What they all experienced together is pretty cool and amazing. There are few people in life you get to cry with, pray with and go through life together...I'm thankful for this couple in my husbands life while he was there. They are amazing...and we miss them now that we are home!

6) For 5 weeks, Adam got to begin bonding with Kellen. He had Kellen with him every day. That is something the 2 of them will always have. Be still my heart.

7) Adam is my hero for jumping on a plane without looking back to go and fight for our son. God used him in so many ways....This has changed us. We are still in awe.

8)When we cleared, our attorney called my cellphone at 6am to tell me. I jumped out of bed, ran downstairs, hopped on SKYPE to call Adam and let him know. One of the best days of my life.

When my dad woke up and heard, he started crying. He held me and said that he could see the weight of everything lift off of me. Our family was a world apart...but stronger than ever.

Now that we are home, we don't want to forget what God did in our lives. In Adam's life. In my life...For our family. We have our ups and downs. We are still adjusting to being a family of 5. We have hard days. Kellen has hard days. Not gonna lie.

But we are so thankful for all the wonderful support from our family and friends. For checking in..for praying. For letting me cry at the office...For sending encouraging emails and letters. For giving my girls extra snuggles when I went to Ethiopia to meet up with my husband and son. It means the world to us. We hope we can return the favor to some of you, one day.

Kellen is an orphan NO MORE. One less.

The adoption process maybe *mostly* over, but really it's just the beginning for him and for us. We aren't done.

There is more to do.

Use us Lord.

Adoption is a beautiful thing. You look past the ashes and scars and see restoration. It's our prayer for others to experience it in their life as well.